A Hatter's Prayer
by CaptainHooksGirl
Summary: The hatter waits and prays for the return of the only woman he's ever loved.  A songfic based on Big and Rich's "I Pray for You."


**Author's Note:** I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING! The Hatter, Alice, and Underland belong to Lewis Carroll, Disney, and Tim Burton, and the song "I Pray for You" belongs to Big Kenny and John Rich. Enjoy the story! :)

**A Hatter's Prayer**

_Sometimes when I sleep_

_I can see you walkin' back to me._

_Sometimes I wake up_

'_Cause I swear I felt your touch._

"Alice?" The hatter woke with a start. He glanced around quickly, hoping to see his damsel in shining armor, but soon realized that he had simply imagined her. His eyes flickered from green to blue. He sighed. "It was just a dream again. Bloody, stupid sandman and his slurvish tricks."

He looked sadly at the end of the tea table where he had set a place for Alice. Mally and Thackery had long gone inside to get some sleep, but Hatter refused to leave his chair until his Alice returned. Every morning he'd set a place for her at the table, and every night he dreamed of the day she would return. But it never came. Sometimes, late at night, when he wasn't quite sure if he was awake or asleep, he could swear he felt the gentle touch of her hands on his face just like that day in the Red Queen's castle.

_Then emotions overcome me,_

_And the darkness is so cold._

He felt the madness rising within him. His eyes turned to gold, and he suddenly sprang from his chair, knocking teapots and saucers all over the place, throwing spoons and cups, ripping napkins to shreds. He was just about to overturn the table when something caught his eye. It was the teapot. The very teapot in which he'd hidden her to keep her safe from the Red Queen's army. He picked it up gently and cradled it next to his heart. A choked sob escaped his throat. "Oh, Alice," his Scottish brogue was thick with emotion, "why did ye hafta go?"

_I light a candle, watch it burn._

_I feel the angels come and fill this room._

_Oh, when you're gone I miss you so much._

_I do the only thing I can do._

_I pray for you._

_I pray for you._

The hatter was good at covering his emotions. He'd learned to do that a long time ago when he'd lost his family in the flames of the Jabberwock. True, his eyes often gave him away, but to some extent, he could control them, too. If he really concentrated, he could fake happiness, at least enough so that his mad friends didn't notice. He was a Hightopp, and he refused to show weakness in front of his friends and disgrace the family name.

But out here, when no one was looking, when it seemed as though there was no one to listen but the shadows, he allowed the tears to flow, gasping and choking on the torrential flood that flowed down his cheeks and soaked his handkerchief until it was too wet to even serve a purpose. Finally, when he felt as though he could cry no more, he got the strangest feeling that perhaps he had not been so completely alone as he'd originally thought. He glanced around nervously, embarrassed by his outburst, but saw no one. Still, he could not shake the feeling that someone was there. He wondered. Perhaps there was Someone who was listening.

He didn't know what else to do, so he did the only logical thing that came to his mind. He took off his top hat and bowed his head.

"Lord, if you're there, thank you for sending Alice into my life. She is the best thing that's ever happened to me." He paused, unsure of whether the Almighty would even take time to notice the prayer of lowly and rather mad hatter. It seemed impossible that He would, but then again, hadn't he himself once said that something is only impossible if you believe it is? He took a deep breath and continued.

"Please watch over her in Overland. I don't understand why she had to leave, but she said she'd come back, and she's terribly late. Please don't let her forget about us…about me…Please bring her back. I miss her so much…" His throat tightened, and his eyes threatened to let loose another flood, but he managed to get the next words out. "But only You know what's best for her…So, please, just let her be happy, whatever happens…and let her know that…" he swallowed hard and he could feel the dam begin to spring a leak. "That I love her."

_Every minute of the day_

_I can clearly see your face,_

_And every minute we're apart_

_Oh, you know it just breaks by heart._

_I'm so lonely, but I'm okay_

'_Cause I know we'll be together again._

He could still remember every detail of her beautiful face as he watched her fade into nothing before his eyes. It hurt so much for him to watch her leave. Letting her go was the hardest thing he'd ever done, but he knew he had to if he truly loved her. He had really hoped that she would have taken him up on the offer to stay in Underland, and at first he thought he'd convinced her.

"But I can't."

Those three words were more painful than anything else he'd ever experienced. He barely heard anything else she'd said after that…He'd been too busy trying to keep his heart from shattering, his world from collapsing, and his chest from bursting in agony. He'd managed to keep his eyes from changing color and put on a smile, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. No one seemed to notice. And no one heard the faint whimper that escaped his lips as he reached toward the spot where the girl he loved had been standing only moments ago.

But she had promised to return, had promised not to forget, and he wanted so badly to believe her, but Overland made people lose their memories, and sometimes he doubted whether she truly even intended to keep her promise or had just said something kind to ease his pain.

Most nights he would spend agonizing over those words…wondering and worrying, fighting within himself. Half of him vehemently stood up for Alice and wondered how he could ever doubt her, but the other half wasn't so sure…Should he just give up? Was he wasting his time waiting for someone who would never come?

_No. She will return. Just be patient._

The answer came loud and clear tonight. From where, Hatter wasn't exactly sure, but something just told him that everything would be okay. He still felt sad, that much was certain, but he felt…lighter. Like a burden had been lifted from his soul. And he felt peace.

_I light a candle, watch it burn._

_I feel the angels come and fill this room._

_Oh, when you're gone I miss you so much._

_I do the only thing I can do._

_I pray for you._

_Oh, I pray for you._

So went the Hatter's nightly ritual. With renewed hope, he began to pray each night. It was always the same, simple plea – a request for her safety, her happiness, and her return.

For months on end, he repeated his prayer, but when nearly a year had passed and she had still not returned, he began to despair. The days were all alike. Each morning he would start out so full of hope, certain that today would be the day, and each night when she did not come, he spiraled deeper into depression. Perhaps some dreams were too good to ever come true.

"God, I don't understand. First You promise me that she'll come back, and now it seems like she'll never come. Are You even listening to me? Are You there? I'm losing my faith in You, in Alice, in myself…I'm so confused. I'm trying hard to trust you, but it's so hard…Please, just let her be happy wherever she is."

_Please hold her and protect her_

'_Til she's back here in my arms again._

_Oh, and tell her how I love her,_

_And I'll be waitin' right here forever, AMEN._

Then one day, it happened. Just out of the blue. He felt a change in the air, felt a spark of life he'd not felt since she'd left. And he knew she was back. Back for good.

"Hatter?"

His green eyes sparkled brightly as he caught sight of her blue dress emerging from the forest. "Alice?" he lisped, hardly believing what he was hearing. Was this just another trick of his muddled mind?

"Hatter!"

Within moments, they were in each other's arms, the girl's golden curls pressed tightly against his chest. He was surprised when she didn't vanish. He could actually feel her arms locked around his waist, smell her sweet vanilla perfume. He ran a strand of her silky tresses between his bandaged fingers. She was really there.

"You…you came back! It's really you! A-and you didn't forget, and you're the right-proper-Alice-size, and – "

"Hatter!" she giggled.

"Thank you," he whispered hoarsely. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Oh, yes, Alice. I'm quite sure. In fact, now that you're back, I'd say I'm much better than fine!"

She smiled up at him. "I missed you."

He squeezed her shoulders gently. "I missed you, too. Would you care for some tea?" He grinned widely, exposing the gap in his teeth.

She smiled back. "Yes, Hatter, I'd like that very much."

As they walked back to the tea table hand in hand, the Hatter glanced up at the sky. "Thank You," he whispered.

_I feel the angels come and fill this room._

_Oh, when you're gone I miss you so much._

_I do the only thing I can do._

_I pray for you._

_I pray for you._


End file.
